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Geek Hugs

I've provided a number of personalised geek hug templates in various forms below, feel free to distribute them as you like--but please note that they're all distributed under the terms of the GPL, so any derivative hugs must be free, as must any second, third (etc.) generation derivative hugs.
All the hugs below are tailored to you personally, if you would like to re-use them, just change the names and parameters.
I'd like to feature a java hug for completeness, but I don't know any java; if you have a java hug (or any other type of hug) you'd be willing to contribute, please contact me in the normal way.
Finally, Don't forget to check out the exclusive hug links at the bottom of the page.


Chat Hugs

MSN hug

Sorry, visual joke.

IRC hug

/me hugs you

Code Hugs

XML hug

<hug>
	<target>you</target>
	<intensity>low</intensity>
	<duration>long</duration>
	<squeeze>average</squeeze>
</hug>

SQL hug

INSERT INTO hugs (target, intensity, duration, squeeze) VALUES ('you', 'low', 'long', 'average');

PHP "hug" class

class Hug {
	var $target;
	var $intensity;	//
	var $duration;	//  these values are specified on a scale of 1 to 10
	var $squeeze;	//

	function Hug($target='me') {	//constructor: if no huggee specified, default to self-hug
		$this->target = $target;
		$this->intensity = 1;
		$this->duration = 5;
		$this->squeeze = 1;
	}

	function intensify($factor) {
		$newIntensity = $this->intensity + $factor;
		if($newIntensity > 10)
			$this->intensity = 10;
		else
			$this->intensity = $newIntensity;
	}

	function untensify($factor) {
		$newIntensity = $this->intensity - $factor;
		if($newIntensity < 1)
			$this->intensity = 1;
		else
			$this->intensity = $newIntensity;
	}

	function extend($factor) {
		$newDuration = $this->duration + $factor;
		if($newDuration > 10)
			$this->duration = 10;
		else
			$this->duration = $newDuration;
	}

	function truncate($factor) {
		$newDuration = $this->duration - $factor;
		if($newDuration < 1)
			$this->duration = 1;
		else
			$this->duration = $newDuration;
	}

	function tighten($factor) {
		$newSqueeze = $this->squeeze + $factor;
		if($newSqueeze > 10)
			$this->squeeze = 10;
		else
			$this->squeeze = $newSqueeze;
	}

	function loosen($factor) {
		$newSqueeze = $this->squeeze - $factor;
		if($newSqueeze < 1)
			$this->squeeze = 1;
		else
			$this->squeeze = $newSqueeze;
	}
}
		

Example usage of "hug" class

$myhug = new Hug("you");
$myhug->intensify(1);
$myhug->extend(4);
$myhug->tighten(4);

// now print out the structure of $myhug
print_r($myhug);
which gives the following output (yep, it's real :-P):
Hug Object
(
    [target] => you
    [intensity] => 2
    [duration] => 9
    [squeeze] => 5
)
		

Miscellaneous Geek Hugs

Linux hug

dave@epoch:~$ hug me
bash: hug: command not found
Ouch! That was uncalled for, I was only trying to be nice.

Links

Huggies
Clivehug
Special hug

✎ Every social system runs on the people's belief in it.